Talk about the date from hell! This one took the cake!

I spoke to this man for a month on the net. We decided to go out the next Saturday for lunch.

He lived 90 minutes north of me so it was quite a drive to my house. He showed up in a beat up red truck that looked like the one from “Sanford and Son”. He got out and greeted me at the door. I was under whelmed. He was unkempt and his clothes were holey.

He explained he’d drive but if he did, my foot may go through the floorboard because it was rotted out and he wasn’t sure the ‘baking sheet’ he placed there would ‘hold’ so I drove.

We went to the Chinese buffet. He told me how beautiful I was and how he was ‘sure’ I didn’t want him either – that no one did. He went on to say that he had lost most of his fingers playing with explosives when he was a teenager and showed me his hands saying ‘see! no one wants a cripple!’ He went on to say he had no job now – that he had lied about having one because a woman with ‘class’ like me wouldn’t date a man with no job and no prospects – that he was about to lose his house which wasn’t a house at all but a trailer but again didn’t want to tell me the truth because he felt I wouldn’t date him if I knew he had a trailer and not a real home – he had no money and he said he knew he was ugly too.

He sobbed and cried hysterically saying if I didn’t want him he was going to kill himself because no one had wanted him and I was his ‘last chance’. I patted his hand and told him there is someone for everyone and he had to be patient — that things would work out for him and he had to believe that. He paid for lunch and we went back to my house.

He then said he had a ‘gift’ for me in the truck and to wait a minute – he had almost forgotten. He took out two paper sacks with booze in them handing me the unopened Boone’s Farm. He was swigging from what appeared to be a third of a bottle left of Apricot Brandy! He pushed his way into my house shoving me to the enclosed front porch. I told him he had to leave. He said no and continued to drink. He told me he was ‘too drunk to drive’ and was staying the night. I told him he was going home. I got brazen and shoved him out the door locking it behind me. Bye bye to the date from hell.

I didn’t know whether to put this under misrepresentation or just plain weird, but I think just plain weird sums it up. People are not always what they represent on the net as you well know and this guy was definitely not.

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